[ryan]

Hi, my name is ryan and I would first like to say what a nice website this is. My father introduced CC to me when I was a kid and thru the years I would read them over and over, wishing I had the balls to make a go at it. I remember hoping I was a dreamer cause stalking behavior filled me with such dread. For a year now I've begun taking real action. I don't even care If CC was lying because the stuff works! I hope to make some real connections with people who are DEDICATED and ruthless with the self. CC said himself that maybe he was was just a "little bit crazy" and I think that's what it takes.

[ensonar]

Welcome

And thank you.

I find stalking to be quite fun. I've seen it mentioned that stalking is heavy and dark and somewhat objectionable. But i've never seen it that way. Stalking is just turning life into nothing more than a hilarious drama. It definitely took me a while to see the hilarity in the drama, but every day life becomes funnier and funnier.

Now if I can just get back to dreaming on a regular basis...

[ryan]

I really like this website. Posts have been scarce lately and I myself haven't had any new expirences to write about. With the exception of trying to losing self importance in my day to day activities and studying (right now its Ken Eaglefeather ) I've been slacking in faithfully applying the techniques. I don't have any good excuses for this, my favorite is; I need to hurry and make enough money so I can set aside a chunk of time to REALLY immerse myself. I guess there isn't anything wrong with this but it's just a way for to rationalize my way out of sitting my butt down and recapitulating or gazing or what-have-you. I'm sure we all have our reasons for posting to this site, and over the months mine has evolved. At first it was all about impressing people or showing them that I was ....Yes! the ONE! Which if I'm in a certain state of mind is embarrasing looking back. After that I wanted everyone to know they weren't trying as hard as I was and that my varied expirences were more profound. Today somethimes I think my self importance is just more sophisticated and I'm better at hiding these things. Other times when I look back over my old post., I definetly see growth. Maybe it's both. My point is that I'm thankfull for the forum and for all of you, not because I know you, but because you give the best and worst of me a chance to express itself. You take the time to converse. I feel a closeness to you thru our common intent, and that alone is enough to compell me to overlook any differences.

[ensonar]

I think it's more common than not, that most of us do the same thing. We go through "ups and downs" so to speak.

But I think what I've realized is that unbending intent is what ties this all together. We can be impeccable at whatever it is that we're doing; whether we're working, or conversing with friends, or whatever. And though we may not be where we'd like to be at the moment, it is unbending intent which will get us there, through the sludge of indulgence, in whatever form it may take.

And besides getting from point "A" to point "B" is never a straight line. There is a give and take all the way. And I believe that is where we learn balance.

[ryan]

thanks