10-15-2006, 07:51 AM
You make me think, i hate/love it.
First, i think that to 'need' to be 'with' people or 'without' them, is something we become, not born with, and for whatever reason. I myself was not a classic loner, but enjoyed, and many times, preferred to be alone. People will not like you for that, they want you to NEED them, their companionship, their 'help' etc. They will not forgive you for being able to survive and be happy without them...
You are just much stronger, that's all.
I don't know how long you have been exposed to the wisdom that Castaneda let us share, but i'm fairly new to that (a year and a half or so), and now i find myself UNABLE to be with the 'normal' people. Yes, i have to interact for my livelihood, but that's why we have Controlled Folly... (well, i lie a bit, sometimes, willfully i'm dragged into the other world...).
I think that a teacher is very very important and very very helpful; i was longing for one too; but, where do you find one? I guess one has to be very careful where he/she puts energy. People are wasting years to look for a guru in India or in Ixtlan...
I remember in high-school, i used to break into my school at night and steal/copy the exam for the next week. If i only spent half of the time and energy i used on breaking into the school, into studying, i would have gotten the highest marks in every test. But, it was so much fun, i even did it in college...
As i see it now, the only reason to live with a companion, (beside making life a little easier with synergy), is to mutually serve as a teacher to each other; be a honest mirror to each other. Well, to find a real friend/partner/lover like that is much harder than finding a nagual...
And, it is a lot of fun living alone, free as a bird. I'm looking around at the 'normal' plastic American people with plastic smiles, surrounded with so many plastic friends; and they are all so lonely and miserable...
:angry: :angry: :o :o
First, i think that to 'need' to be 'with' people or 'without' them, is something we become, not born with, and for whatever reason. I myself was not a classic loner, but enjoyed, and many times, preferred to be alone. People will not like you for that, they want you to NEED them, their companionship, their 'help' etc. They will not forgive you for being able to survive and be happy without them...
You are just much stronger, that's all.
I don't know how long you have been exposed to the wisdom that Castaneda let us share, but i'm fairly new to that (a year and a half or so), and now i find myself UNABLE to be with the 'normal' people. Yes, i have to interact for my livelihood, but that's why we have Controlled Folly... (well, i lie a bit, sometimes, willfully i'm dragged into the other world...).
I think that a teacher is very very important and very very helpful; i was longing for one too; but, where do you find one? I guess one has to be very careful where he/she puts energy. People are wasting years to look for a guru in India or in Ixtlan...
I remember in high-school, i used to break into my school at night and steal/copy the exam for the next week. If i only spent half of the time and energy i used on breaking into the school, into studying, i would have gotten the highest marks in every test. But, it was so much fun, i even did it in college...
As i see it now, the only reason to live with a companion, (beside making life a little easier with synergy), is to mutually serve as a teacher to each other; be a honest mirror to each other. Well, to find a real friend/partner/lover like that is much harder than finding a nagual...
And, it is a lot of fun living alone, free as a bird. I'm looking around at the 'normal' plastic American people with plastic smiles, surrounded with so many plastic friends; and they are all so lonely and miserable...
:angry: :angry: :o :o