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It seems to me that we're discussing loneliness here... And probably that's why this forum exists, too - people want to keep their image, not just to share information? I often have that 'I'm so lonely that I want to die' mood. What can be done about it? Impeccability can be done about it, I think Recapitulation can help to sever links to others and make you detached. But, it's a long way to go...
In fact, you know that you have nothing in common with people around, they are who they are and are happy to be. But still you feel like you want their company. Why? Their company, even as useless as it is, makes you feel that you 'exist'. But what exists is that 'image for others' that CC and others tried so hard to eliminate.
If you tell someone about nagualism, you're destroying your chances at freedom. You're adding nagualism to your image, so that you'll have to stop practicing nagualism now to eliminate that image. A dead end.
Why stopping to practice makes you feel suddenly free? I think that happens when you lost your motivation and are trying to find it. CC had gaps in his apprenticeship, too We're changing, we're requestioning ourselves what we want all the time. And we might stop practicing altogether, coz there's noone to nudge us. So it's not surprising. For myself I decided to never requestion myself again - the changes in my 'character' happen often anyway, so that motivation has to be renewed all the time. One thing fits the idea about responsibility and inability to cancel one's decisions: if you start questioning yourself, just remind yourself that you've made the decision already and you're the one responsible for it. Works for me so far.